According to me, this sequence has been pretty darn abstract.

That was kind of on purpose. It’s the opposite of what I like to do, of what I think I’m good at. I much prefer to engage with an actual specific thing, and to share the details of my experience as I go. This big picture stuff is really not my jam.

But I’ve been trying to paint a really big picture anyway, to describe an entire perspective on investigation, and rationality, and maybe life. I hope it’s been much easier to read than it was for me to write. And I hope that if, at some future point, I dive into the little details of particular exercises and techniques, you’ll be able to contextualize them as more than just trinkets, or rituals that are tedious to little purpose.

But I’m so tired of it. I’m exhausted by all this abstraction. I want to touch the ground. I want to show you what it actually looks like to live a life full of patient and direct observation.

I can tell you that there’s a magnifying glass in my pocket, which I use regularly. I can tell you that I turned the soles of my bare feet toward the sky last week, so that I could feel the snow falling on them. I can tell you that when I put “it seems to me” at the front of so many of my sentences, it’s not false humility, or insecurity, or a verbal tic. (It’s a deliberate reflection on the distance between what exists in reality, and the constellations I’ve sketched on my map.)

I can tell you dozens of facts like these, about my experience of myself and of the world. Hundreds. But none of those means much. Not on its own.

The problem is, this whole thing is founded on patience, which is difficult to demonstrate in an essay. It’s hard to show you all at once the myriad ways a thousand tiny moments add up to one big thing that matters.

Still, they do add up to something.

What they add up to is that I am a naturalist. I was raised to be a naturalist, and it worked. I was raised to be someone who yearns to know the territory through patient and direct observation. My childhood memories are full of mushroom hunting, finding newts under logs, following game trails, reading the geological histories in the rock layers whenever we traveled, and sketching the paths of Jupiter’s moons with a red flashlight beside my telescope.

My upbringing emphasized that the world is an infinity of wonders; unfathomably many in a single handful of dirt...

Intro to Naturalism

Intro to Naturalism